Increase Your Tolerance with Children: A Guide

Strategies for Increasing Patience with Your Children: A Guide

In the realm of parenting, patience is a precious virtue. It's not always an easy task, but it can yield significant benefits for both parents and children.

Communicating with children is a golden opportunity to support them. Instead of resorting to yells about it being time to go, asking why they want to stay put can open up a dialogue that helps children process their feelings and learn to manage them better.

Viewing the journey of parenting as a marathon, not a sprint, can help manage impatience. This perspective allows parents to approach situations with a calm and patient demeanor, fostering a nurturing environment for their children's growth.

Research has shown that children learn emotional regulation techniques by mimicking their parents. This underscores the importance of parents practicing patience, especially when managing a distressed child. A parent's emotional regulation can have a profound impact on a child's emotional development.

Specific parenting programs promoting patience in parents to support children's emotional development are not widely available, such as in Germany. However, this doesn't mean that parents can't take the initiative to cultivate patience on their own.

Two studies from 2013 highlight the benefits of such efforts. The first found that students who applied mental contrasting, using the if-then technique, improved both their grades and school attendance. The second study revealed that preschool-age children who participated in a year-long mindfulness yoga program demonstrated better self-regulation, including increased attention and more control over their inhibitions.

Practicing patience doesn't mean avoiding all moments of frustration. Losing one's cool occasionally is almost inevitable. However, being mindful of these moments and striving for patience is crucial.

Identifying triggers of impatience, such as running late, tantrums, sibling fights, etc., can help prepare for those situations. Developing communication strategies to increase the likelihood of success with getting children to do what you ask can be beneficial.

Strategies like the if-then technique (e.g., if child talks back, conversation will end; if child whines, offer a distraction) can help plan for impatient moments. Shifts in routine to avoid triggers and creating strategies for when impatience occurs can lead to smoother interactions and less frequent loss of temper.

Moreover, practicing patience with children can help them learn to manage their emotions. Teaching children about mental contrasting or practicing mindfulness together can help develop patience in both parents and children.

Practicing mindfulness, either through yoga, meditation, or journaling, can help reduce emotional exhaustion, stress, anxiety, depression, and improve self-compassion, quality of sleep, and relaxation. This, in turn, can lead to a more patient and nurturing parenting style.

In conclusion, patience is a valuable skill in parenting, with far-reaching benefits for both parents and children. By identifying triggers, developing strategies, and practicing mindfulness, parents can cultivate patience and support their children's emotional development.