Strategies for Alleviating a Child's Anxiety

Techniques for Alleviating a Child's Fearfulness

In the world of growing children, fear is a common companion. From the age of 2 to 14, up to 90% of children develop at least one specific fear, such as a fear of animals, the dark, or imaginary monsters or ghosts. It's essential to understand that most fears diminish over time, but some may persist and potentially limit a child's development and opportunities.

Recently, a 3-year-old son was gifted a battery-operated 2-foot tall robot with flashing red eyes. While the intention might have been to bring joy, the son was frightened by the robot and ran away. This incident serves as a reminder that our reactions as parents can play a significant role in how children cope with their fears.

Punishing a child for being afraid by walking away or isolating him in his room will increase his panic, not diminish it. Similarly, "protecting" your child in this way signals to him that there is something to be anxious about and that you don't think he can handle the situation. An over-response on your part will have two unintended but unfortunate consequences: If you panic, the child will believe he has something to panic about. If you react with lots of hugs, words, and fuss, she'll learn that a sure-fire way to get your attention is to act afraid.

Instead, it's important not to belittle a child for being scared, as it adds shame to the original problem. Trying to talk a child out of an irrational fear may not be effective. Recognizing and validating a child's fear can help reduce their anxiety. The author recommends reading books together about kids who master fear as a way to provide relatable examples and encourage resilience.

Learning to cope with unusual, unpredictable, or frightening things is essential if our children are to feel empowered to take care of themselves. Teach relaxation skills, and encourage your child whenever they draw on courage to do things. Help them distinguish between when being afraid tells us to be cautious and when it is just getting in the way of doing something new and exciting.

The Mental Health First Aid (MHFA) course led by Andrea Rakers is a specialist approach to reduce irrational fear and lower tension levels through psychological first aid techniques. Seeking help from a mental health counselor can be beneficial for addressing irrational fears that are limiting adults, including parents.

In the end, the uncle put the robot in a corner and comforted the son. The son eventually wrapped the robot in a blanket to carry around like a baby, showing that with time and understanding, even the most frightening things can become manageable. Let's help our children become resilient, empowered individuals who can face their fears head-on.